An Antithesis to Nesiaweekism

Do you realize why it is so easy for men to lie, to love, to tease, to flirt, to make love to a total stranger, even to rape?

Few days ago, I can’t help noticed bunch of writings with subject about women that’s written by man. Some are true some are very very wrong.

Instead of correcting those wrong parts, we -women- prefer to chew them, slowly. What we have left?

Confusions. Lots of them.

We go like, wow, I don’t really understand what he s saying but it seems true and … hmm, I don’t know, he could be right. Who cares anyway? I enjoy his company and don’t mind with those bubblings. (God, have mercy on us!)

Men! Can’t live without them yet live with them is like sitting in a giant rollercoaster. Thinking of them as a sexy and romantic being could fly you to an eden. So keep this in mind everytime you feel like wanting to sell your soul to one of these ‘evil beast’, every supersensuous man has a flip side that is shocking and amazing, even when we already knew those since our teenage years. Some could make us laugh, some make us cry. Some are just making me sick! Aren’t you?

Let me remind you of those list (again).

Do you realize why it is so easy for men to lie, to love, to tease, to flirt, to make love (to a total stranger) even to rape? It is all because their knowledge and understanding about wrongdoing is way way up too high. What we women think is wrong, is a simple right for them. So from now on, learn to understand there is a huge gap between our comprehension and theirs. That s what bothers me much. Most men, has an enormous tolerance about (their) sins.

That is why white lies, the need of a woman for (at least) three hearts, affairs and cheatings, is considered as ‘just’ accesories to them. Don’t you just hate them when they lied to you, even when they said it is for our own good.

Girls, remember this. When it is too good to be true, then it is not true! Affair and cheating, are the biggest lie of all, their most ‘good looking weapon’, with word ‘my soulmate’ as their last pick-up line that could melt you in seconds!

Fact number one, men do lies, for their own good, not for us! Trust me. It is their ego they want to save and protect (only God knows from what! Yeah, right, like they do have something to be saved!).

But don’t worry, there is a little advice about this problem. Make sure that the time lag, between the lie took place and the time he confessed, is decreasing. Hopely, he would learn to lie and confess at the same time, meaning, no more lie. (But, don’t count on that too much. There will always be a time lag. Can’t be zero and keep it away from minus level. Let him have a litle piece of you to tease.)

Fact number two, like us, they do concern about how they look! Yes, all of them. Even when they curse and hate the metrosexual clan or those who love to dress up, trust me, all men do care about their physical appearance. I mean, really care. Oh, I am too short, my skin is too dark, my hair is too curly, I am too lame, or I need to be ‘as strong as’ can be. Especially when it is time to meet a woman.

They do think that women are a very ‘dangerous toys’ so it is sometimes been understood that they need to ‘prepare’ things very carefully. Meaning, lie (again!) as much as it takes. Then they put on a suitable mask for every different occasions, just to get the looks they wanna be.

So, you do realize that when they are beginning to take off their mask, one by one, and stand ‘naked’ before your very own eyes, congratulations, he is all yours and yours alone! Not everyday you get to meet this kind of guy. I am glad I have my own though!

Fact numbers three, boys will be boys, men will always be boys. Damn! This fact is the one that make me laugh, thrilled and amazed. In every grown-up (male) you could find a baby inside. I don’t know wheter it is a curse or a blessing in disguise for us, but facing this flip side of a man could make us fall in love, again.

But don’t worry, this personality is not very often shows up. Mostly, the boys side that we see is so ridiculous and childish that make you sick! It is when they could not focus and play around all the time. Pfiiuhhh! Anyway, don’t let this consume your energy.

Just trust them, that even when they act so, actually they are trying to become men, at least at their own definition. Off course, not all of them could manage and succeed, but hey, give them a little credit will ya!

Too complicated right? Whats complicated can’t get any worse if we know how to handle them well. Trust yourself, always. A woman instict has never been proof wrong. Even if it does, consider yourself unlucky! Let go and live it up again. Don’t be too hard on yourself!

For you who still don’t have a man of your own, cheer up! Enjoy your me-time while you can. You’ll never know until you lost it, because sometime you don’t even have that luxurious me-time by the time you got ‘tied up’ to one (or more) man, except your bath time. Could be worse, sometime you even have to take a bath with him, share your only me-time left.

Ladies, let’s march together for happiness!


Jika Anda membaca dengan cukup serius posting ini, pasti kerasa dong bukan tulisanku. So woman, and too good to be my english.

Yep, ini dari salah seorang pembaca wanita, blogger juga, Annisha, yang kelihatannya sedikit “terganggu” dengan ide-ide utama tulisan dalam blog ini. 😉

Very-very interesting, kata orang Batak, mengetahui sudut pandang wanita terhadap sudut pandang kita terhadap mereka. Tadinya mau kuterjemahkan, tp kemudian aku berpikir, penulisnya membuat ini in english, pastilah untuk sebuah alasan.

So, Man, find out another way… 😉


28 thoughts on “An Antithesis to Nesiaweekism

  1. Defending Nesiaweekism!

    Should man always be honest with woman? The answer is no — not if you know what’s good for you. The truth is, you can’t afford to always tell the truth if you want to keep your relationship healthy. Sometimes you just have to hedge your bets a little with a little creative sugarcoating.

    Women say they want men to be honest, but if you are, the only thing you’ll be going home with is an armful of DVDs from the back room of the video store. The truth is, women force men to lie. The majority of women out there won’t even bother to have a conversation with a man unless he has the right job, owns a house in a geographically-desirable area, and earns a large salary.

    So if the average guy wants to score a date, he’s compelled to “upgrade” his job description a few increments or pretend his BMW’s in the shop just to get a woman’s digits.

    A man will be constrained to submerge his true personality and adjust his opinions in the hope of getting a little sex. And instead of allowing men to express themselves openly and honestly, most women force men to be “politically correct,” sometimes even at the threat of losing their jobs.

    This isn’t honesty — it’s catering to an extremely sexist society, biased toward women. Of course, she’ll wear makeup, dye her hair, and put on a padded bra, and it won’t even occur to her that she’s deceiving anyone (including herself).

    So if you want to start dating, or keep a relationship up and running, you’re going to have to tread carefully through this minefield of her creation. Simply put, if you want to keep her happy and keep getting laid, you’re going to have to learn how to lie — and lie convincingly.

    So, Nesiaweekism is the only way to win millions of women’s hearts. It’s work, at least for me.

  2. ann!sha

    And you call that defending? The way I see it, you just made Nesiaweekism even worse. Thank you for adding those facts. 🙂

    Buat Bu Venus, dalem nyuwun pangaksami amargi mboten ‘nate’ sowan dumateng panjenengan. InsyaAllah, mantun mekaten, dalem saged asring sowan. Matur sembah nuwun teguran-ipun.

  3. Defending Nesiaweekism!

    I said the majority of women out there… May be you don’t in the category — I pray for that — but unfortunately most of women does.
    Nesiaweekism — what I understand, sorry to the founder 😀 — not a bad way, it’s the answer to the bitter reality.
    Man and woman relationship is an action-reaction things. Our strategy, incluiding lying, is always a reaction to the way most of women treat us.
    When a woman show an acceptance and understanding from the beginning, then we, men, won’t need to lie to build a relationship with you.

  4. mamasakura


    Ngga pernah suka aku sama yg namanya BOHONG! Apapun alasannya. The only people that force themselves to lie, is the person lying themselves. Sooner or later The truth always comes out. You’re better off just telling the truth.

    Aku malah pernah mengecam ide-ide berbohong di blog ini, tanpa mengurangi rasa hormat kepada pemiliknya. Lebih baik jujur kan?

  5. jejakkakiku

    Lie convincingly? Wow!

    Ok, a few months ago, I even got a statement from the mouth of that kinda guy. He got 4 lovers. YUP! I dunno how he manage it, but he got ’em ok.

    He got a tip from his friend also about getting caught, when you’re doing it. He said, NEVER admit it, even you’re caught in the act.

    I was in awe, I can’t believe it. How can someone can’t admit that one did something awful and get caught and still not going to admit it?

    Probably, this is what you men mean by lie convincingly. But then again, why don’t one just admit it? Sometimes we -as women- can really take it, *trust me* when you said the truth. Its going to be hurts like hell, but it’s going to passed, eventually.

    Instead of the truth, why lie? I wonder, why…

  6. may

    big thanks to sis anisha… now i armed my self with more weapon
    i’ve already learn now it’s time to play my next level

  7. ann!sha

    Bahkan disinipun ada ‘praktik’ Nesiaweakism eh maaf, maksud saya Nesiaweekism 🙂 yang sekali lagi perlu ‘diluruskan’.

    Visualisasi perempuan bermata ijo (cewe matre) dan bergincu tebal (for sex) itu bukan sedikit ‘mengganggu’ tapi benar2 mengganggu deh …. Mudah2an tidak seperti itu maksudnya yah?

  8. Toga

    Bukannya justru pandangan yang menganggap bahwa setiap cewek bermata hijau itu matre, dan yang bergincu tebal itu for sex, yang perlu diluruskan?

    Saya malah mulai berusaha belajar memahami wanita seperti itu barangkali hanya ingin kelihatan cantik, itu saja, bukan sedang ingin menguras uang atau membangkitkan birahi seksual siapapun.

    Tapi begitu pun, lihat sisi baiknya, saya sudah mengecilkan foto itu, bahkan sebelum mendapat komentar dari penulis yang selalu kukagumi ini.


  9. hoek

    ah…maaf kalo saia OOT, yang jelas saia jadi OOT soale
    1. ada boso linggis
    2. tentang wanita… (men from mars, women from venus) :mrgreen:
    walofun saia uda mbaca, tafi ya saia sedekah komen OOT ajah..mhuehuehue

  10. Wikiliepedia

    Is Nesiaweekism a teaching about lying? Cool.

    OK, let’s see the comparison.

    Here are the reasons why men lie:

    1.He’s trying to prevent you knowing an important truth

    Let’s get it out there right away – sometimes a man is trying to deceive you big time. Numero uno, he’s trying to hide actual infidelity. You’re right to take this very seriously. How would it be to be with a man who, say, steals from you? Same diff.

    2. He’s trying to avoid pain.

    No-one likes pain. People will use every trick in the book to avoid it – it’s just that a man’s playbook is very thin. There are many male strengths, but each man has his own buttons – get close to pressing one and he jumps. “Why didn’t you tell me that you couldn’t get tickets?” “It hurts me if you’re unhappy.” (Note, several of a man’s buttons have to do with his need to be admired as a man see #7).

    3. He’s trying to avoid conflict.

    A subcategory of #3. This isn’t always a bad thing; too much fighting is bad for a relationship. But too much of this avoidance is a danger sign. Not because it means he’s betraying you, but because you’ll begin to see him as afraid of standing up to you. There’s nothing sexy about wimpishness.

    4. He doesn’t want to burden/worry you.

    Here’s a classic example: you’re pregnant and want to talk about your new future. For his part he has several concerns too – how will your relationship change, will he be a good father and provider, and so on. But you hear nothing of this. Instead he lies about what’s on his mind. Why? Well, he’s very conscious of the physical and emotional demands on you of pregnancy, birth, and motherhood – so he chooses not to bother you. I’m not saying it’s a good thing, I’m just saying that he’s being gallant.

    5. He’s trying to protect you.

    A subcategory of #4.

    6. He wants to surprise you.

    He pretends to have forgotten your birthday, then Surprise! OK, this probably isn’t a biggie, but I mention it just to drum home the fact that not all lies are equal.

    7. He doesn’t want to lose face as a man.

    Oof, now this is a big one. A man will do just about anything – seriously, anything – not to feel emasculated, including lie. Women will be surprised just how precious men are about this. My advice? Don’t try to fight him on this terrain; he’ll only feel that you’re humiliating him for not being a man. Imagine what it would be like if you were looked upon and treated as a man – worse, as a non-woman. Just as you need to be cherished as a woman, so he needs to be admired as a man. Deal with it.

    8. He’s trying hide a bigger lie.

    “Sorry, honey, I have to go away for work next weekend”. In reality he wants time away from you and so volunteered for the trip. This is pretty damn cunning: for a man, that is. Freud called it, “confessing to the lesser crime”.

    Then the reasons not to lie (to a woman)

    1. Don’t lie because you’ll get caught.

    That’s pretty obvious. Memory is a finicky thing, and lying is never worth it — as you’ll read later on. But even knowing this obvious fact isn’t enough to prevent most of us from pushing the truth a little. What is amazing is that lying actually breaks some of my more esoteric rules I’ve mentioned before.

    2. Don’t lie because you’re giving away too much information.

    That is a rule, if you recall — shut up. Talking too much and providing too much information about yourself too quickly is a sure way to drop her desire for you into the freezing temperatures. Whether you’re telling her the truth about your job or pretending you’re bigger than you are, it doesn’t matter — you’re talking too much. Yap, yap, yap sends you home without the phone number, maybe even without the name. Just meet the gal for the first time? Say hi, get her name, listen to her yap for 5 minutes. Get her number, move on! It isn’t that difficult, fellows.

    3. Don’t lie because she’s not interested anyway.

    What do most guys lie about? Their jobs, their cars, their income, their previous dating career, their hobbies, their goals, their living situations. She’s not interested. You might think she is interested because you yourself would be interested in those facts, but you’re a guy. You might hear some of your gal pals brag about how much money their boyfriends make or how nice of a car they drive, but that isn’t what she really is interested in — she’s just bragging to friends. You could live at home with your parents, work at Wal*Mart as a janitor, drive an 87 Buick with rust, and she’d still brag to her friends by saying “He is so focused on the future and having a family, he gives up so much now so he’ll have more to share later!” That’s right, guys, she doesn’t care what you have, so why bother lying about it?

    4. Don’t lie because she isn’t worth it.

    Lying to others can cause guilt in your heart and your mind. For those with religion or faith here, lying is considered a “sin” or an “evil” or whatever your particular religion calls it. For those without that faith, lying can make you feel bad — especially if your lies don’t attract her attention (and they generally won’t, unless she’s a golddigger). Whether or not you get her name and number, the lies you tell to get there will haunt you on some level. It isn’t worth the risk.

    And my newest favorite reason not to lie is…

    5. Don’t lie, she prefers average guys to the high-rollers.

    I didn’t believe it at first, but for years I’ve know that average guys are happier than guys who have way more. The guy with the great looks, the Platinum Citibank Card, the BMW 7 series, the condo in Singapore? They’re not that happy. Sure, they have so much wonderful stuff, but few of them have wonderful gals. Don’t believe me? The BBC concurs in an article titled “Why women fall for ‘Mr Average’.” For a while, I couldn’t figure out why my average friends had better luck than my “blessed” friends, until it struck me — these average guys will be better fathers and husbands for their wives. Sure, the golddigger girl wants the guy with everything, but why would you want her? Have you seen the mess that is left behind when a friend of yours dated (or married) a high-drama wants-everything girl? You know already that Little Miss Average would be Best Amazing Wife moreso than Hot Tall Skinny Blonde would, so doesn’t it makes sense that Little Mister Average would be a great husband? Of course, you don’t make those connections by default — women do.


  11. tobadreams

    “…unfortunately most women does.”

    Tak ada yang perlu aku komentari lagi.

    Btw thx lae Toga sdh berbaik hati memasang banner aku di halaman yang semarak dan seronok ini. Tabik.

  12. Nieve

    our big problem here is, women don’t lie and men don’t listen.
    tapi apa beneran nesiaweekisme itu melulu seni berbohong?
    biarpun beberapa postingnya memang seperti mengarah kesana, tapi pendiri “paham” itu bertanggung jawab memberikan klarifikasi, atau anda memang berkeinginan dinobatkan sebagai Bapak Kebohongan!

  13. ann!sha

    Don’t lie becos :

    6. Sometime there is no turning back
    7. It consumes too much energy
    8. You ll make her lie to you too

    8 vs 8, then, you must know now what to do ….. 🙂

  14. Lavender

    See, I’m on nobody’s side.
    I’m even (according to my friends) a bit ‘manlike’ for a woman, so I don’t find myself capable in giving a judgment for either men or women.
    I’m just saying that lying is not the privilege of men or the privilege of women.
    Lying is simply wrong, however, there are still some circumstances that force us to lie.
    In that case, although it’s not completely a mistake – our mistake, we just can’t help but lie.
    Nothing’s wrong with lying if it can make someone live longer, for example.
    So, decision is in our hands, whether we’ll lie or not.
    No offense, okay…

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  16. Salngam

    Why the theory of Manpower Planning chenge to Human Resources Management?. The answer is, for modern societies men and women are sexually equal. Theory usually infered from statistic. Talk about lies to human everybody does, when the time is right. Lies to human is subject to caught. So if you do not good in it, I recommend don’t do it cause the consequence is painful, whoever you are. Peace.

  17. yan

    Nothing wrong with the difference between women and men, they must be different as well. What makes women think that they are despised by men is the thought of they are less powerful than men, indeed, they are more powerful. The problem is they do not know their power that they can use to make the men think that they,women and men, are really sexually equel. They can be both up and down, he he he !

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